Being Blue

Chalmers Street

O'Dwyer — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 06:49:36 +0000

Tires bobbing in and out of holes in this road

Intersection buzzing

New cars

Old cars

The clink clank of dragging mufflers

Despairing people walk by signs declaring

This is Motor City!

Vagabonds chase after a dime or quarter at a time

Can you hear the tears Chalmers cries?

Drugs being passed and stashed

Where you work and children play

Schools and teachers disappearing

Dealers emerging and substituting—

Take the street life, not the book life!

The corner store clerk

Slips unmarked green

With some dirty change

Adding to another addict’s demise

Can you hear the tears Chalmers cries?

Another fire

Has claimed its own

For hell has come to Detroit

A long time ago

Half torn down buildings

Mark yesterday

And today

Surrounded by dead trees

Missing grass and gritty dirt

Dilapidated houses

Frown and bow

To passersby

Can you hear the tears Chalmers cries?

Taboo

O'Dwyer — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 06:37:21 +0000

I committed murder

And

Suicide

All with one poem

Unconscious in a Confessional

O'Dwyer — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 06:35:08 +0000

A secret life
Breathing
Growing
Living in a poem
Myspace
7 letters till freedom
Reality
7 letters till being
A prisoner in my own war
Falling down the stairs
Of what’s acceptable
Pissy drunk
Liquor called Self
Can’t see the line
Let alone walk it
So don’t expect me to
Say hello
To a different kind of Blue

Sane Asylum

O'Dwyer — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 06:32:26 +0000

Straight laced
In a padded room
I sit and cry myself to sleep
Don’t comfort me
Run
This lady sings the blues
No heroin to be found
Yet breaking down
Standing on tip toes
But still touching the ground!!!
Mind floating
Driving me backwards
Toe to heel
Toe to heel
Now
Rearward spinning
No god to take the wheel
Dressed in white
Arms across my chest
Buried in a coffin
Of Sealy’s
Running
North
South
East
Or West
Bouncing back
Without a sound
Boxed in from my best
Can you hear me crying?
Or
Is this room
Completely
Soundproof too?

Coffee

O'Dwyer — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 06:24:29 +0000

Plenty of smears upon my desk
Linked together
In a crazy fashion
A couple so dark…
Telltale signs of a couple dark days
Slammed down foam cups
Full
Piping hot and rough—
No cream, no sugar
Then there are the others
Variations of brightness
Speaking of happier times
Rings from sugary, overfilled mugs
Or the result of rushing—
My eagerness dripping near my keyboard
And I am awake
Regardless of circumstances
Never with enough time
To wipe away my mood rings

This poem is dedicated to my soul sister, Joan!!!

End of…

O'Dwyer — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 06:18:04 +0000

I learned the true meaning of freedom

I thought long and hard about it

Feeling that it’s time

To set you aside

Crying

Terror reigns here

I JUST WANNA BE FREE

Even if that means the end of you

And the beginning of me

Am I?

O'Dwyer — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 06:16:36 +0000

Am I
Living too much in the past
When I ask
Why you didn’t want me?

Am I
Not acting my age and stage
Being a child
Because I am curious about your face?

Am I
Fooling into believing
Hopelessly deceiving
Myself?
Thinking one day
Before you die
You would answer
My question, “Why?”

Antibiotics

O'Dwyer — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 06:14:30 +0000

You didn’t want me
Unfortunately
The mirror shows me
The image of a girl
Stuffed and zipped inside of a woman
That doesn’t blame you
I can barely stand myself

And now

I live
Day by day
Expecting rejection
Lost connections
The lack of affection
My whole life has been an infection

Of you

Steel Toe

O'Dwyer — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 06:12:01 +0000

I sat
Waiting for you
To never come
Head in my hands
I could not cry
I just wanted to support
The weight of my thoughts
The weight of my heart
Floating
Before kicking
Little fractures into my skull
Repeatedly
Repeatedly
Repeatedly
I ask, dejectedly
Did you forget about me?

Fantasy

O'Dwyer — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 06:04:50 +0000

Time has placed you here with me

Created your presence

From particles of imagination

So I experienced you

And

I tried to erase you

To pry your lips from the body of my memory

I thought I ran away

But the freedom your love provided

Captivated me

Seemingly crazy

Still

Feel

Your

Hands

Though I never felt them at all

Dreaming and assuming…

In your hair,

I can smell the hint of cigarette smoke

Covered by jasmine incense

And a laugh escapes me

Because you were never good at hiding anything

Selfishly

Like a cheap magician

I disappeared

Yet never left this box

That is my soul

Allowed the knives to pierce me whole

Practically saw me in half

All to say goodbye

When I never really said hello

You filled me

Gripped me

Held me

Kissed me

With only a voice

And a picture

Dreams of island getaways

Sex on beaches

Covered in the sands of treason

Evading reality

To explore

A world

Least like my own

Away from home

And in your arms

Again

To YOU with love…

Missing You…Missing Me

O'Dwyer — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 06:03:16 +0000

I’ve been gone for a while
Let my tears freeze
In place upon my face
Trails symbolic of my journey
Close to my lips
And now I speak
To say I missed you so
I missed seeing my reflection
In your eyes
I missed tracing my finger
Along your lips
And disappearing in your embrace
Like a shield
You covered me
But I am not weak
Wearing this armor
The WHOLE armor
Preparing to live without you
Though always reaching out to you
Blue…

Gentleman

O'Dwyer — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 06:02:01 +0000

I wasn’t a fool

I wanted to fall for you

To dream of your face

So many miles away

To dare take a taste

As I closed my eyes

Listening to your voice–

I miss your voice

And the accented comfort

That it brings

I miss sipping tea

While reading your rhymes

Taking time

That wasn’t mine

To indulge in every bit of you

Laying out on this stage

Wishing you could join me

In my fantasies

Sweaty, clasped fingers

Entwined legs

Music screaming

Torsos thumping to the beat

Like an 808

But that day won’t come

Though tomorrow will